I just caught my father reading to my little sister. It's both sad and heart-warming. Anything can happen to us at any time, and we're realizing it more than we ever did. I remember his excuse back then--that he works 40+ hours a week and is too busy to help out with my sibs. I'm happy to see him spend time with his kids.

He made me everything that I am today.

You really don't expect this to ever happen in your family. I'm too much in shock...tomorrow it might hit me hard. Emotions always seem to take a while.

Finally...!

I'm enjoying The Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy! Finally it's a book I cannot predict the outcome, for once! I have no idea where it's going... and that's the way I like it!

I think 1 more visit to Borders should do the trick. I felt really happy drawing Atsuko-chan, and I felt an inkling of spunk to take out the legal note and ink-pen out of my bag. (But I didn't.) Drat! 1 more time, tomorrow!

I bought a Pita-Ten artbook. It's so pretty and shiny.

Interesting dinner.

Yeah.

My dad and I fight over a lot of stuff over the dinner table. We never really "fight," just argue. Usually it's politics or law because it seems either the news, "Cops," or "America's Most Wanted" is on air. (During lunch-time it was the "People's Court" or "Judge Judy." XD)

Other times it's "America's Funniest Home videos," but we don't talk when that's on--we're too busy laughing our asses off. In between the arguments, I talk about stuff. Now that I think about it, I'm unusually open with my parents. But then again, they do ask questions about the people around me...

A couple days ago I told them that Durran would finally be able to go to Japan and all that good stuff, and then I went on with other stuff. Then today, I told my parents to not yell at me because I don't think I'll be able to go to Korea like they said. Now that I look back, I wish I could've done even more for my essay. Yeah, I spent a few weeks working on it, but it's total crap. I should've put more detail into my motives. They got mad, but not as mad as I expected. Then silence as we continued eating.

Then my Dad mentioned Durran with his usual "that boy" title, since he doesn't really know any other guy friends I have, so it could only mean him. He said I should try going for the same thing he's doing. I was like, "You want me to go to Japan?!" He shrugged and was like, "well, yeah..."

I told him it was impractical, and that by the time I could apply, graduation would be drawing near. Also, this dude in charge of the exchange program back at UIC told me that I wouldn't be able to take useful classes since I was finished with my general studies, plus the fact I was an english major. It'll probably be the same thing at SIUC.

But...so weird! My parents never really liked it when I mention anything about Japan or whatever. They don't hate them; I think it's more foolish pride than anything.

Wonder why they want me out of the country so much, lol. They want me back, and now they want me away. I know they're looking about for my own good though.

Unrelated news...uhh. I got a shot today...hurt like hell. The Kenshin Kaden book came in the mail today. So happy--it's pretty. Still waiting for my Tsubasa Chronicles artbook to come...

Yeah. Still trying to pull through. I feel so locked in place.

Hikaru-kun's very restless...

I really don't know what to do.

I know what's the problem. I'm scared. I really don't want to see all the mistakes coming from my hand. But this hiatus is going much longer than it should. I'm still drawing, and at least I still feel motivated to do so--but it's already past the season. I should be working on the project. I feel horrible knowing that the time is close and yet I'm doing nothing about it.

I wish I could go out--but with gas so high, I can't. And I never could work on the project in my bedroom. I have to work where people meander about. Groan. I'm sorry Hikaru-kun. Atsuko-chan. I fail.